pseudostoops

now clogging the internet elsewhere

17 August 2006

om

After learning that joining a gym for one month in New York was going to cost me $250, I decided that it was about time that I Learn Yoga. Nevermind that I am spectacularly uncoordinated and my soul is not really adequately primed to receive spiritual enlightenment. It's cheap! And supposed to make you limber and flexible! Sign me up! So this week I've gone to yoga three times in an effort to get the full value of my $20 unlimited one-week newcomers pass. All was going swimmingly- I hadn't fallen over onto anyone, yoga pants had not fallen down, teacher had not drawn attention to my shocking inflexibility in front of everyone- until today, when we were doing some kind of pose involving lifting our legs very high in the air, the woman in front of me KICKED ME! In the FACE! With her gross bare feet! And then, instead of saying "sorry for planting my untrimmed toenails in your nose," she said "you're too close to my mat." I wanted to say "well, sweet pea, there are 35 of us crammed into this little room- I'm about as far from your mat as I can be without actually sitting in the lap of the person practicing behind me," but all I could muster was "sorry." Not sorry! Really not sorry! Unclear why I felt compelled to apologize! I believe I will take the day off from yoga tomorrow. I need to re-center.

2 Comments:

At 8/18/2006 11:39:00 AM, Blogger Green said...

It's gut instinct - I do it too. Someone complains about something involving me, out pours, "I'm sorry" from my mouth. Never mind that all they just said is "Hey! Your hair looks better than mine!" I'm sorry. I blame it on mothers who drilled good manners into us. They drilled too far.

 
At 8/19/2006 02:33:00 PM, Anonymous samantha jo campen said...

I always bust out the "I'm sorry" when someone runs into me on the street or in the office or something. Wasn't my fault. I was standing still. But? "I'm sorry."

My other favorite (sarcasm)? I'm going to the bathroom in a public bathroom stall. Some woman accidently busts in on me. She says (rightfully so) "Oh my gosh I'm so sorry!" and my immediate knee-jerk reaction? "Oh it's okay!"

No it's not! I'm in the most vulnerable position in my entire life and had the door closed and locked to avoid such an occurance. And I say okay? WTF?

The post was awesome. Very well written. And laugh-out-loud funny.

 

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