It wouldn't be any other way

Jonas, I hardly knew ye. We hardly got a chance to bond or anything, because approximately 24 minutes after I learned of your existence, I got a phone call from a woman named Peak! (who said her name, Peak!, with such enthusiasm that there's no way to write Peak! except with an explanation point,) who cheerfully informed me that she was a friend of the original leaseholder of the apartment I was subletting (no, I did not sublet from the original leaseholder, I sublet from another subletter because I AM A FUCKING IDIOT) and she would be by at nine o'clock that evening to pick up all the furniture. Oh. Like, ALL the furniture? Like the dresser and (more importantly) the bed and (most importantly) the television? Yes! I managed to talk Peak! into waiting until the next morning to pillage my apartment so I could have one more night of sleeping there. "No problem!" said Peak! "I have keys anyway so I can just come while you're at work tomorrow!" Ahem. You have keys anyway? Yes! Turns out the original leaseholder was very generous with her promises of furniture to all of her NYU LLM friends, and there were several other people who also had keys to the apartment, and Peak! told me helpfully that they, too, were planning to come by at different times to pick up other pieces of furniture. REALLY glad to know that I've been living in an apartment where, at any given moment, an international law student could have barged in and requested that I please let them take the microwave now. So after talking to Peak! I put my stuff in my suitcase and moved to Murphy's place on the upper east side. After that, the rest of my time in New York went by in kind of a blur. I got drunk at pub trivia, worked my tail off for the last two days of my job to try to impress them, had an exit interview during which I got both a job offer AND an offer to write me a stellar recommendation whenever I need one, picked myself up off the floor (where I had fallen from the shock,) stayed up all night on Friday so I could get in a cab at 4am to catch my 6am flight out of LaGuardia, and got home to Chicago on Saturday morning. Where I promptly realized that, since John is on a business trip and I didn't bring my keys with me to New York, I was locked out of my apartment. Figures.